Where are the rules about how to re-enter, now that I finally slowed down and got comfortable? Where is the handbook? I have heard a lot about relaxing and being aware of the importance of self-care and now I am supposed to go back out there to this strange new world of social distancing and wearing a mask. Recently, after returning from a few necessary visits to the doctor, I can report that although quite different, they actually went well…actually quicker than usual. I also entered into the “new” world of grocery shopping with one-way aisles that changed from store to store and checkout procedures that did the same.. After getting used to slowing down and paying more attention to my space and yours, I was also confounded by the shopping bag rules that shifted views depending on which store and which county I was shopping in. Plastic here, paper there…you can bag, you can’t bag, unless you’re using your own bags.Several weeks back, I even got a chance to venture a short visit to the beach, where there were almost no people. Beautiful! Two weeks later…it was packed…phase 2. So now am I supposed to go and use public transportation in the regular way…the bus, the train, and the ferry, and think I will have no one rubbing up against me? Well this is surely a strange world with many different views and view points. While some rules are implemented others die a sudden death as soon as they are tried for a few hours. My governor thinks we can do it if we are smart, but sometimes I wonder if the people who are instituting all this planning are smart enough. Where is the leadership beyond the gubernatorial level? Will this administration be able to execute a safe plan for us or are we just going to be pawns in a game of tryouts? Will those last few people who suddenly leap in a packed train as the doors squeeze people close- will they adapt to safe social distancing? As always, some will and some won’t… but I know as team players in the game of life vs. covid19, this virus is just waiting for us to relax. New Yorkers are brilliant when they have to be, but it’s still each man for themselves when we feel more at ease. The PTSD we will eventually become more accustomed to and we will stop being paranoid and overreacting. I know for me after 9/11, it took years for me to stop thinking there might be a bomb in someone’s back pack. So, now we are the bombs. The sneeze and cough are the enemy now… the invisible virus is the terrorist as we scan who is wearing a mask and who isn’t…or as Gov. Cuomo put it…a chin guard. Do I go out and get some anti-anxiety medication now or will it be later on for the depression to set in? Can I handle it? Of course I can. I have done it before and many people before me have endured far greater inconveniences than this. Somehow, if I don’t OBSESS about it too much, things will work out for themselves, or they won’t. In the meantime, I will wear my mask, keep social distancing, keep a hand sanitizer on me… and also keep washing my hands. I mean, should we ever stop washing our hands? I don’t think so… I mean they are pretty much wash and wear. After all is said and done, I commute when I have to. I will breathe and let my fears go and be extra vigilant about touching my face. If anything, the mask reminds me to not touch it. I will have gratitude that I can breathe and that I can be of service. I just keep hoping and praying that someday we will be smarter, a little more compassionate to those around us, and able to take a nice easy breath effortlessly.
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